Foaly's Carrot
by aethre
Summary: The red-faced Commander and the red-haired Captain are stuck on the bottom of the ocean in Foaly's Carrot. With a limited supply of food, and living together in close quarters, how well will the two elves get along?
1. Prologue

*~*~*~*~* Foaly's Carrot *~*~*~*~*

            ~ Mage Kitty

            -----------

            Prologue

            -----------

            ~ Excerpt from Foaly's Log, Disk 104 (Encrypted, far better than that Mud Boy)

            ~ (Translated: Gnommish to English)

            My Super Ship is complete.  She is completely brilliant, if I do say so myself.  Completely aerodynamic, smooth, far more advanced than what anyone has done before.  My baby is every fly-boys dream.  She can go through magma, air, water, space.  You name it, she can do it!

            I've bragged enough about my beautiful ship.  You already know everything about her, don't you?  Holly and Julius think I'm crazy, talking to a 'diary' as if it were real.  Ha!  You _are_ real!  I _know it!  Stupid elves…_

            The 'stupid elves' are going to try out my baby today.  I wanted to go instead of Julius.  He said, I quote, "Foaly!  You made the ship.  Be happy with that.  You know that you can't fly worth shit.  I can't fly well enough, either.  But _I_ have to be on the ship.  You know the rules.  Short is our best pilot, she gets to drive.  I know you want that, anyways.  We have no choice.  It's either you or Holly.  That is no choice."  Stupid.  I should have built that ship for three instead of for two.  I would have, but, no, let's cut the budget in the pony's department!  So instead of Holly, Julius and I testing my baby, it will be just Holly and Julius.  Stupid elves…

*~*~*~*~*

            Well, they left.  The elves marched their way onboard, with big grins on their faces.  Even Julius.  Damn them.  They had the nerve to say that my baby looks like a carrot!  Sure, she's orangey and carrot shaped.  And the blaze behind her is green.  But really?  Calling my baby a _carrot?!?  Holly even christened her 'Foaly's Carrot'!  Julius made a few remarks about not working when I'm hungry and that I'm as bad as the 'convict.'  Though, technically, Mulch isn't a convict anymore.  I don't know how he did it, but I'll find out!  I would suspect Fowl, but he's no longer a threat.  Mind-Wiped._

            I half-wish that that mud boy wasn't Wiped.  He's the only one who understood what I was talking about.  Holly gets the idea, but Fowl understands it all.  And asks very lovely questions that are welcomed, unlike Julius'.  Fowl is entertaining.  I know Holly misses him.  She took a liking to punching him.  Julius half-misses him because there was always something going on with him around.  If only Fowl could have seen my baby.  _He'd_ appreciate her!  Stupid elves…

            Oops.  Something is flashing.  Better check on it.

            ~ Foaly

*~*~*~*~*

**A/N:**  And that was the beginning of my Holly/Root story.  I noticed that in a lot of the H/R fics, Holly has long hair and Root is all buff and handsome like.  So I am making Holly and Root how they are in the stories.  Sorta.  There will be a few changes, but mih.  Please leave your thoughts in a review and tell me what I could do better.  This fic is another of my fics without Artemis.  Man, I really have something against him.  I have a grand total of two fics out of six with Artemis in it.  And one fic is a little more than a page long and the other one is mainly making fun of Artemis.  I have no life.  I'm done rambling now.  Almost.  My prologue was one page long.  Damn that's short.  Short…  Hee hee hee…  I'm going to leave before I scar your minds anymore!

_            ~Mage Kitty ^^_


	2. Holly: Entry I

*~*~*~*~* **Foaly's Carrot *~*~*~*~***

            _~Mage Kitty_

**A/N:**  I'm writing this on paper during Science…  So bored.  Oops.  I'm called on to answer a question…  Uh…  *makes up random answer*  That seemed to work.  Yay.  I guessed  right.  I'm so smart.  Not.  Come on…  Call me down to the Muli-Room for my picture.  Bored.  I know all this Science shit…  I'll do the Disclaimer now…

**Disclaimer:**  I own neither Foaly, Root or Holly.  But I semi-own Foaly's Carrot.  As much as you can own a made up Fairy Ship…  I own the red pen I'm writing with, though…  My mom bought it…  So maybe it's not mine…  I'll shut up…

*~*~*~*~*  **Holly**** – Entry One *~*~*~*~***

Taken from Capt. Holly Short's written journal

Somewhere in the bottom of the Pacific Ocean

Inside _Foaly's Carrot_

Pilot's Seat

            Foaly's ship failed.  Miserably.  Sure, she can do everything Foaly said, but the engines are messed and the communications shit isn't water-proof.  The centaur is losing his touch.

            Root's flipping out.  As long as he doesn't break anything, I don't care.  I have ear-plugs in, anyway.

            I think I better take an inventory.  The Commander is quite useless.  Let's see…

            ~ Enough food to last a month, by my amount of consumption (Who knows with Root)

            ~ 1000 sheets of loose leaf (Foaly put _paper _in his ship?  How odd…)

            ~ 10 Fairy pens (Far superior the Mud-Man kind)

            ~ 1 Fairy Exercise Machine (Why did Foaly put that in his ship?)

            ~ 1 Bathroom (Thank Frond!)

            ~ 1 De-Salter (Yay.  We can drink salt-less sea water…  That's kind of an oxymoron)

            ~ 1 Useless Commander (Seriously.  All he is doing is screaming and flipping out)

            ~ 1 Broken Computer (No E-Mail.  The world's coming to an end!)

            ~ 1 Deck of Cards (Yay.  Something to do)

            ~ 1 Wall Ball (More things to do)

            That about sums it up.  Now.  Let me copy this down on a different sheet of paper.  Can't have Root reading this copy…

            Well.  That went, er, well.  Root attempted to break something, but I stopped him.  He's using the Exercise Machine now.  Maybe being stuck down here won't be so bad…  If Root gets into shape, I'll win my bet.  Mwahahaha! I said that Root would only get into shape if he was bored.  And he is bored.  He said so himself…  Wait…  With him using the Machine, there is nothing for me to do…  Something tells me that I'm going to become a Solitaire Queen…

~

            Solitaire is boring.  I'm bored.  Maybe I'll sing a song…

            Me:  *innocently singing*

            Root:  Shut up!

            Me:  Nooo…

            Root:  I command you to shut up.

            Me:  Ruin my fun.

            Root:  I outrank you, Short.

            Me:  Holly.  I don't wanna be called Captain or Short for Frond-Knows-Long.

            Root:  Fine then, Holly.  Just _shut **up**_.

            Me:  Shutting.  Shutting…

            So much for that…  hmmm…  Humming!

            Me:  *humming the song*

            Root:  Hollyyyyy…

            Me:  Hey, I'm not opening my mouth.

            Root:  Don't make any noise.

            Me:  I'm bored.

            Root:  You made a noise.

            Me:  Eep.

            Root's getting mad.  I'll torment him later.

            D'Arvit!  I just remembered!  If I'm not back by tomorrow, I won't be able to get the Anarchy Disk!  NOOOO!

            Me:  NoooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

            Root:  What's wrong _now?_

            Me:  *on ground sobbing* I'm going to miss getting a Disk by my favourite band…  NOOOOOOOO!!!

            Root:  *kneeling down besides me* Which band is it, Holly?

            Me:  Anarchy…

            Root:  They've got a new Disk coming out?

            Me:  Tomorrow.

            Root:  Why wasn't I informed?

            Me:  You know about them?

            Root:  They're my favourite band too.

            Me:  *looks up into Root's deep brown eyes* You like Metal?  
            Root:  Oh, come on!

            Me:  That was a dumb question.  Yelling and all…

            Root:  *hums song by Anarchy*

            Me:  *sings lyrics from that song*

            Once Root actually got singing, he isn't that bad.  For Metal bands…  Imagine Root singing Pop songs.  Shudder, shudder.  He's back on that Machine.  A few more days working out like he is, he'll look like Captain Ash Vein.  *drool* Now _that's one ****__hott elf.  Trouble's got nothing compared to Ash…  Frond, if Root reads this, he'd have so much blackmail on me.  Not even Foaly knows about my, er, crush on Ash.  At least he hasn't mentioned it.  And Foaly would mention it.  And announce it over the All-Call thinger.  He's real bad at keeping information to himself.  I don't know how Foaly doesn't know.  Frond knows how much of an idiot I am around Ash._

            Bwahahaha!  I finally found a use for written English!  When Root went through the Academy, he would have learnt Latin…  So he won't be able to read this!  I'm so clever!

            I'm going to get something to eat.  Later,

            _~ Holly_

*~*~*~*~*

**A/N:**  Short.  Don't kill me.  People don't write kilometres in journals…  At least I don't.  I don't even write half a letter.  Don't have any woes asides from having too many FF stories to handle, a Writer's Block which came on a little while after I finished writing this on paper and an Artist's Block.  Wow.  Actually, that _is_ a lot.  Considering all I do is read, write and draw…

I figured out how to do italics and stuff.  See!

_Italics!_

**Bold!**

Underline!

I feel special ^^

**_            Mage Kitty =^.^=_**


	3. Julius: Entry I

*~*~*~*~* **Foaly's Carrot *~*~*~*~***

            _~ Mage Kitty_

**A/N:  **Alive again…  Although I was never dead…  Yes…  And I have an idea!  Sorta!  It has to do with bands.  Anarchy is kinda based on another band that I like.  So whoever can guess which one gets…  I dunno.  I seem to be doing the funny contest thing a lot ^^;;;

**Disclaimer:  **Don't own Holly and Julius.

**Slime frog:  ***smiling lucidly*  I got some more stuff up ^^  It took me a little more than a month, though…  I'm bad at updates ^^;;;

**Phire Phoenix Chan:  **Thank you ^^  And I'm going to finish this.  I like it very much ^^

**Chibi-Chiri:  **The kind of Metal is more Nü Metal than anything.  I've always thought that Holly would like Rock and stuff like that, but that's probably because that's what _I_ listen to…  

*~*~*~*~* **Julius – Entry One *~*~*~*~***

Taken from Cmdr. Julius Root's written journal 

Somewhere in the bottom of the Pacific Ocean

Inside _Foaly's Carrot_

Floor

            Damn that centaur.  Making the seats too small for me to sit in.  I'll wring his neck when I get back to Haven.  I'll cut off his hooves, stuff one in his big mouth, one in each ear and the last one up his ass.  I'll gouge out his eyeballs and shove one up each nostril.  I'll chop off his tail and hang him with it.  I'll burn him slowly, painfully.  Bloody centaur…

            Well, that's better.  Holly kicked me off the exercise machine.  Now there is nothing else to do.

            Hmmm…  A deck of cards.  52 pick up.

            Holly:  ROOT!  WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!?

            Me:  Playing 52 pick up, what does it look like?

            Holly:  Are you _trying _to get rid of one of the only entertainment items we have?

            Me:  It's only a deck of cards.

            Holly:  Only…  _ONLY A DECK OF CARDS?!? *attempts to attack me*_

            Me:  *pushing on Holly's shoulders* Whoa…  Calm down, Captain.

            Holly:  What.  Did.  I.  Say.  About.  That.  Word??

            Me:  Not to call you that, _Captain._

Holly:  *begins pushing me into the wall* Are you trying to make this more difficult than it is?

            Me:  Me?  You're the one yelling!

            Holly:  So, it's a little roll reversal.

            Me:  *lets go of shoulders*  Holly, calm dow- whoa!

            Holly:  *knocks me over and lies on top of me*  Calm?  YOU WANT ME TO BE **CALM?!?**

            Me:  That would be a good idea.

            Holly:  Infuriating, infuriating fairy!  AARRRGGGHHH!

            Me:  *trying to push Holly off of myself* Er, Holly…  Can you at least get off of me?

            Holly:  *blushes*  Er, sorry Commander…  *pushes herself off of me*

            Me:  Thank you.  *sits up*  Now.  Are we feeling better.

            Holly:  *grumbling* All the cards better be there…

            Me:  *picks up cards, counting as I go along*  50, 51…

            Holly:  *eyes narrow* Roooot.  Where's card number 52?

            Me:  Maybe I miss counted.  *counts again*  50, 51.

            Holly:  WHERE'S THE OTHER CARD???  OH FROND, WHERE IS IT???

            Me:  It's got to be around here somewhere…  *crawls around on floor*

            Holly:  *joins me in crawling around on the floor*

            A few minutes later

            Me and Holly:  FOUND IT!

            Me:  What?  *looks up*

            Holly:  *looks into my eyes*

            Me:  *stares at Holly, then, after a while, looks at card*

            Holly:  Er…  We found it.

            Me:  *faintly*  Yes.  Yes, we did.

            That was very unusual.  I never realized how pretty Holly's eyes are.  Sparkling with good humour and determination.  And the way they light up when she laughs.  Her lips, so – WAIT A MINUTE!  What am I thinking?  This is Holly.  Captain Holly Short.  Frond, she's only 84!  But she's turning 85 next month.  Ahh!  Traitor mind.  She's way too young for me.  But other than that, she'd be great.  AHH!!  Stupid voice!  Get out of my head!  Come on, face it, you fan - SHUT UP!  JUST SHUT UP!

            Now Holly's looking at me oddly.  No, not Holly again.  Umm…  What else to write/think about?  Anarchy.  Great band.  Though very ironic that I like it.  Considering they are singing about how crap the Council is.  Holly likes them -  ARRRGGHHH!!!  NO!! MIND!!!  STOP IT!  Bands.  Keep thinking about bands…  Anarchy songs.  Good.  Sing in mind…

_We fought your wars with all our hearts,_

_You sent us back in body parts,_

_You took our wills with the truth you stole,_

_We offer prayers for you long lost soul._

_The remainder is,_

_An unjustifiable, egotistical, power struggle_

_At the expense of the Fair Folk's Dream,_

_Of the Fairy's Dream, of the Fairy's,_

_Of the Fair Folk.___

_We don't give a damn about your world,_

_With all your global profits, and all your jeweled pearls,_

_We don't give a damn about your world,_

_Right now, right now._

_You bring about the stick,_

_We bring about the confusion,_

_Bring about the solution,_

_Bring about the fusion,_

_Bring about the collusion,_

_Bring about revolution,_

_Bring about revolution,_

_Bring it about._

_No flag large enough,_

_Shame on a man in cuffs,_

_You closed your blinds._

            And again and again and again...  Something like that.  That was the song that me and Holly were – AAAHHHH!!!  NOT AGAIN!  Stupid, stupid mind...  Something not about Holly...

            AHA!  I'm writing this in English!  Never found a use for that language before this.  Learning two Mud Men languages.  Blah.  What was wrong with Latin???  Nooo...  All us LEP Fairies had to take a course about English.  Blah.  So boring.  So now Holly won't – AAAHHH!!!  HOLLY AGAIN!!  That's it.  I'm stopping writing in this.  Period.

            _~ Commander Julius Root_

*~*~*~*~*

**A/N:**  Sorry that the chapter is only a little over a thousand words and has a lot of lyrics...  I know it's a lot...  I cut down the song some.  Also, it gives you an idea about the band.  Oh, yes, I don't own the song.  'The band' does.  Substitute 'Fairy's' or 'Fair Folk's' to 'American' and you get the lyrics.  Whoever can tell me the name of the band, or abbreviation, and the song's name, wins...  something...  Yes...  That is pointless...  So is all this...  I'm leaving.

            _~ Mage Kitty =^.^=_


	4. Holly: Entry II

*~*~*~*~* Foaly's Carrot *~*~*~*~*

            ~ Mage Kitty

**A/N: **Ya know, I don't really have anything to say…  Except for, screw the contest thing.  Anarchy is sorta like System of a Down.  Sorta, not really.  I just take their songs and change a few words ^^;;;

**Slime frog:  **I'm doing more soon ^^  I'm doing more now ^^

**EvilImp532:  **Thank you.  And I'm updating, obviously ^^

**Dragoness Fighter:  **Thank you, and I'll keep this up ^^  It's fun ^^

**Alex472:  **-_- Great to see that it is becoming ultra amazing for me to update.  Sarcasm is fun ^^

**Black-knight-1988:  **Ooo!  I feel quite honoured ^^

**UberSpiffySheep****:  Yes, spilling stuff on keyboards tends to lead to you losing your head, doesn't it?**

**Chibi-Chiri****:  **There was a point to Root playing 52 Pick Up.  A very vague and not realized point till I read your review, but none the less, a point.  It is to show that Root is an idiot and doesn't know any other card games.  Not even Solitaire.  Tisk, tisk…  How could one not know how to play Solitaire?  I can see Foaly playing 52 Pick Up, too!  Tee hee hee ^^

**Phire**** Phoenix Chan:  **Thank you.  And the abbrev thing doesn't really matter anymore.  I figured it out!  Cmdr ^^  I feel soooo very smart ^^  Thanx for the review ^^

**Disclaimer:  **I don't own Holly, Julius or Foaly.  I sorta own Ash Vein, but his name was mentioned once or twice in the books.  At least his surname…  _Foaly's Carrot_ is all mine, though why I'd want a broken ship confuses me…

*~*~*~*~* Holly – Entry Two *~*~*~*~*

Taken from Capt. Holly Short's written journal

Somewhere in the bottom of the Pacific Ocean

Inside _Foaly's Carrot_

Locked self in bathroom

            Bloody Root.  Bloody 52 Pick Up.  Doesn't he know any _other card games?  Stupid, fat elf.  Actually, that isn't quite fair.  He _has _been losing weight.  Good old Fairy Exercise Machines.  Built perfectly for toning or bulking up, combined with an elf's speed at getting fit (or unfit), a fair with Root's fitness will be all Ash-like in a week.  Ash…  So very hott Ash…  Frond, even thinking about him…  No, let's not go there…  How am I supposed to live without Ash around to drool over?  Ah, yes.  My beloved Ash Vein.  Sexy, sexy, sexy Ash Vein.  Ah, yes, I'm obsessing.  Obsessing is so much fun.  Mmmm…  If only I had a picture of him…_

            Frond this bathroom is small.  I can touch all the sides while standing in the middle with absolutely no effort.  No, don't think about that, Holly.  Breathe.  Write.  Ash.  Tall.  Blue eyed.  Small space.  Black haired.  Walls closing.  Pale – AAAAAHHHHHH!!!!  OWHDSdOIDSNlsIDOEHLKDLSIDNSGEOD!  WALLS!  NO!  AAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!

            Root:  Holly!  What's wrong?

            Me:  WALLS!  NOOO!  
            Root:  Holly!  Open the door!

            Me:  NOOO!!!  WALLS!  CAN'T BREATHE!

            Root: HOLLY!  *body slams door and the lock breaks*

            Me:  The walls…  no… wa…

            Root:  *slams open door and scoops me up in his arms*  Holly.  What's wrong?

            Me:  The walls.  The walls…

            Root:  Frond Holly.  *carries me out of the bathroom and sits on floor, holding me in his arms*  What's wrong?

            Me:  Walls…

            Root:  Dear Frond.  Holly, are you claustrophobic?

            Me:  yes…  Since I was kidnapped.

            Root:  And you haven't told anyone.

            Me:  No.

            Root:  Why not?

            Me:  It's weak.

            Root:  Weak?  Holly, it's not weak!

            Me:  Tell that to the Council.

            Root:  So that's why you won't go in elevators…  How can you pilot a ship, then?

            Me:  As long as I don't think about it, I'm fine.  Flying takes all my concentration.

            Root:  Holly, does anyone else know?

            Me:  No.  Not even Foaly.

            Root:  How did you keep something like that a secret?

            Me:  I was doing fine until now.

            Root:  I'm not going to give you a lecture…

            Me:  Thanks…

            Root:  Are you feeling better now.

            Me:  Kinda.

            Root:  *tightens his hold on me*

            I've rescued my journal type thing from the bathroom.  I can't have Root reading this, so I crawled into the bathroom, retrieved my papers and pen and nearly fainted.  Damn it, I _hate small spaces…_

            That whole thing with Root was very odd.  And I didn't even mind Root holding me like that, much.  How very weird.  Hmmm…  Maybe my claustrophobia is getting to my brain…  Stupid Fowl.  Everything is always his fault.  Kidnapping me and sticking me in a cell, leading to claustrophobia.   Damn it, something like that could lead to me losing my job.  Oh, Frond!  What's going to happen to me now?  Root knows, he'll tell his superiors, I'll get reviewed, and the Council will think that it's a great idea for me to get kicked out.  Frond, I'm screwed!

            Nearly time for lunch.  I'll make some for me and Root.  Ciao,

            ~ Holly

*~*~*~*~*

**A/N:  **Once again, another short chapter by your cat loving friend.  And it only took me, what, eight days to get this up?  Record!  Anywhos, I have no idea how a claustrophobic people act, but, hey, these are Fairies, they could act different from us Mud Men…  Or women. 

            _~ Mage Kitty =^.^=_


	5. Julius: Entry II

*~*~*~*~* Foaly's Carrot *~*~*~*~*

            _~ Mage Kitty_

**A/N:  **Nothing to say, except sorry for the long wait.  I was sick.  I still am.  And my brother ends up getting the computer more than me these days…  and the TV times changed.  Stupid Daylight Savings Time…

**Radioactive Bubblegum:  **No more short chappies?  Oh my God.  When that happens, assume that Hell's frozen over.  It's either short chappies, or none at all.  Or even longer update waits.  I kinda lose track of my thoughts after a few pages.  Asides, if this fic's chappies are longer, it will take longer to update my other fic…  I would love to write long chappies, but it's an issue of the amount of time I have on the computer.  Well…  It's fun writing Holly obsessing over Ash, way too much fun.  Claustrophobia is an odd thing for the LEP's best pilot ^^  Tapping feet don't scare me.

**TazMoon****:  **I'm updating as soon as I can.  You've seen, I think, how often I get on the computer lately.  And I've gotta read, too!

**EvilSpirit****:  **Of course it's between Holly and Julius!  Would it be between Holly and the wall ball?  Or Julius and the deck of cards?  Lol…  Sorry, I couldn't resist ^^  Hyperness is fun.

**Dragoness Fighter:  **I know!  Holly and Julius are soo sweet together ^^  Or maybe reading too much Hermione/Snape has completely scarred my brain for good ^^

**slime**** frog:  **Isn't cool the best word when you cant think of any other…  Gawd, I should pay attention in English.  Well, the grammar part…  the word that describes something.  You get what I mean, right?  I love the idea of a claustrophobic Holly as well.  It's terribly funny, but not really.  It's sorta cute in an odd, odd way.  Ah, well, I'm odd ^^  BRING ME TO LIFE!!!  WAKE ME UP INSIDE!!  I'm sure you know the rest…

**Chibi-Chiri****:  **I didn't see Holly being claustrophobic coming either.  Wow.  I finally spelt claustrophobic right on the first try!  You know how things just… happen, when you write?  That is what the claustrophobia thing was, to the extreme.  I was just typing then I was like "Okay, Holly's gonna start yelling and Julius is gonna break down the door.  And Holly is claustrophobic."  So I wrote it down…  It was… Odd.  Yup, sparks are flying, two chapters into the story! *whacks head* At least nobody has told me to slow down…  I have two speeds.  Too slow and too fast.  In my mind ^^  Wow, you think my fic is 'great as always'?  Amazing.  I feel… special… privileged…  insert synonym here…

**Radioactive D'arvit:  **It has gotten to the point where it is a miracle that I update, hasn't it?  I'm so terrible…  Can I have my chocolate now???

**Phire**** Phoenix Chan:  **I know, isn't the Fairy excuse the bestest???  I love it and over use it ^^  I'm usually a H/A too, but I didn't feel like writing one, and I don't got a plot bunny for one either…

**Kelsey:  **Hi!  Holly's claustrophobic in a steel carrot.  What fun for her ^^  I though TAI was going to be a H/R too.  There is sooo many places ^^  Actually, TAI was part of the reason I wrote this.  I really hope Colfer puts in a Holly/someone romance, too.  Really, no romance, even a tiny, tiny bit, is the thing I'm most peeved about in the AF books…  I'm a romance reading type person…  That and most of the books/fics I read have romance, and half the time I didn't even realise it…  I'm updating!!  About as fast as I update my other fic…

**Jenny:  **Yeah!  I'm writing, writing!

**Tonduil**** the Elf:  **Whoa.  You reviewed an hour before I updated.  I would have updated this soon, by a few hours, but I had to leave the house…  Creepy…  Not really, but still…  Did you have fun reading my pitiful fics??  *laughs*  When I opened my inbox and it said, four reviews, I was like, "Whoa!  The Radioactive peoples are yelling at me again"  But it turned out to be you and another person for one of my HP fics ^^  Thanks for reviewing ^^

**Disclaimer:  **I don't own…

**A/N:  **wow.  I wasted a page nattering replies to reviews.  If I missed you, I'm terribly sorry, and I'll get you next time.  Though, how I could miss someone is beyond me…  I only get a few reviews ^^  I'm wasting more space, so on with the fic!

*~*~*~*~* Julius – Entry Two *~*~*~*~*

Taken from Cmdr. Julius Root's written journal

Bottom of Pacific Ocean

Inside _Foaly's Carrot_

Floor

            I realise I said I would never write here again.  But, in truth, there is nothing else for me to do when Holly is using the machine.  Since she doesn't like 52 Pick-Up, there is nothing else to do...  So I'm stuck doing this...

            I really hate that centaur.

            Poor Holly.  I really do feel sorry for her.  The Council is on her back for anything, and now she reveals that she's claustrophobic.  The Council doesn't need to know about that.  The Council is too busy to worry about the slight problem with Captain Short...

            Mmmm...  Holly's not bad of a cook.  Protein Bars cooked on the heater...   What a delicacy...  Why in Frond's name didn't Foaly put a microwave in here?  There is an exercise machine, what's the use of that?  Talk about a weird idea of necessities...  While I'm at it, why isn't there a Disk Player here?  Useless centaur.

            Holly's shuffling the cards...  I suppose I could use that machine, but that's beginning to get boring.  Oh, who am I kidding, I hated it from the beginning.

            Is it just me, or is it really hot in here?  Maybe if I had a drink of water...

            Nope, still hot.

            Holly:  Er, Commander...  Does it seem really hot in here to you?

            Me:  *to self* Well, I'm not going insane...

            Holly:  What?

            Me:  I was thinking it was hot in here too.

            Holly:  I'll turn the heat down...

            Well, that's that.  In a few minutes I won't be sweating through my jumpsuit.

~

            Er, the heat is getting hotter.

            Me:  Um, Holly?

            Holly: I turned it down, I swear!

            She did.  The heater is turned off, for Frond's sake!  Now the heater is busted.

            Holly:  *muttering* Frond, we're screwed.

            Me:  I hope this isn't Foaly's idea of a sick joke.

            Holly:  Oh, Frond!  He would!  He's probably sitting in the OP's Booth laughing at us!

            Me:  He probably has this playing on all the screens in Police Plaza.

            Holly:  *pales* Frond, I'm screwed.

            Me:  You'll be fine, Holly.  I've got a voice in the Council.  They won't kick you out, if I have anything to say about it.

            Holly:  *small smile* Thanks...

            She's smiling at me, she's smiling at me, she's smiling at me!  D'Arvit, D'Arvit, D'Arvit.  No, stop.

            Me:  It's no problem.

            Nope, none at all...  Anything for Holly.  Oh, Frond...

            Holly:  Sooo...  Do you want to play a card game or something?

            Me:  Sure...  Uh...

            Holly:  You've got to be kidding me!  You don't know any card games! *laughs*

            She's laughing at me...  Nooooo...

            Me:  Uh, yeah...  I know how to play Go Fish...

            Holly:  *laughs*  I'll teach you a few.

            She's still laughing.  Frond, this is humiliating...

            Me:  Uh, sure...

            Holly:  Well, 21 Blackjack...

~

            Wow.  Now I know how to play 21 Blackjack.  Holly whipped my ass, though.  Stupid dealer.

            Holly:  *hands on table leaning forward, close to me*  Now you owe me a pound of gold.  *sly smirk*

            Oh Frond, Frond, Frond!  She's too close!

            Me:  I'll pay you later.  I have no gold on me.

            Holly:  Whatever.  *leans back*

            Good...  Damnit, that girl's gonna be the one who ends up giving me a heart attack...

            Holly:  Damn heater.

            Me: Yeah.

            Holly:  Er, be right back...

            Me:  Wha?  Oh, oh, oooh.

            Holly:  *rolls eyes and smiles*

            May as well use that bloody machine.

            Holly:  ROOOOOT!

            Me:  Uh, that's me...

            I sound so pathetic.

            Holly:  What did you do to the door?

            Me:  What?

            Holly:  Frond, it's nearly off its hinges, the locks busted...  Root, the door pulls open, not pushes.

            Me:  What are you talking about?

            Holly:  When you knocked down the door.  You completely destroyed it.

            Me:  Oops?

            Holly:  *whimpers* Frond.

            Me:  Would you have rather me left you there?

            Holly:  Frond, no!

            Me:  I panicked, okay?

            Holly:  You panicked over me?

            Me:  Uh, yeah.

            Holly:  *standing in doorway, confused*  Why?

            Curse that word!

            Me:  Well, uh...  Um...  heh heh...

            Holly:  *throws up arms*  Whatever!

            Well, at least she stopped asking me why...

            She's fixing the door now.

            There is nothing to do.  I'll watch Holly.

            Holly:  WHAT ARE YOU STARING AT?

            Me:  Nothing, nothing.

            Wow, she isn't in a good mood.  She fixed the door.  The toilet flushed.

            Holly:  WHAT.  ARE.  YOU.  STARING AT????

            Me:  Spaz.

            Holly:   arrr...

            Uh, she left some of her jumpsuit undone.

            Holly:  STOP STARING AT ME!  YOU'RE CREEPING ME OUT!

            Me:  Sorry, sorry.

            Holly:  I'm going to sleep.

            Me:  You do that.

            Holly:  *stalks to a corner of the ship*  *lies down and sleeps*

            There is nothing to do.  I think I will join Holly in sleep.  Opposite corner...

~

            Brrr...  It's freezing now.  Holly's shivering...  Maybe if I just sleep closer to her, she won't be so cold.  Body heat and all that.  She's warm...

*~*~*~*~*

**A/N:  **Wow, I think this is my longest chapter for this story...  Pitiful.  Well, Day One of the evilness is over...  In case you are wondering why I chose 21 Blackjack, it's the only card game I know...  Except for Solitaire and ones that need special decks...  Toodlez, I'm being kicked off the comp and it's bloody freezing downstairs...  Well, now that it's a few hours later, I remembered that I have something else to say…  Next chapter is a special, ish, one…  TazMoon knows what I'm talking about, I hope ^^

            _~ Mage Kitty =^.^=_


	6. Foaly: Entry II

*~*~*~*~* Foaly's Carrot *~*~*~*~*

            _~ Mage Kitty_

**A/N:  **Well, FF.Net is down…  so I'm just gonna write…  Not like that's a bad thing…  Oh yes…  People who left a signed review got e-mailed by me.  Cause I was bored.  And I stole that idea from RheaLee ^^  tee hee hee ^^  If I didn't email you it is because I forgot and am a stupid kaka head.  Or it got sent to your junk mail folder, or whatever variant your mail service thing calls it ^^  People who left anonymous get answered where I always put them…  right below the A/N ^^  When FF.Net gets up and running again…  Oh, and this chapter is a little…  Odd…  Er, implied sex, if you will…  heh heh ^^;;;  It's still PG-13, though…

**Phire**** Phoenix Chan:  **What would you do if you woke up with Julius sleeping next to you?  Tee hee hee…  Foaly's alive, don't you worry…  MWHAHAHA!  Er, there was no reason at all for that…

**Blondee****:  **Obviously, I can stop there, cause I did.  AND NOW I SHALL TORTURE YOU MORE!  BWHAHAHA!  Hyper!

**Tonduil****:  **I'm too lazy to write out your full name, lol.  Thanks for the website, I'll need it ^^

**Evil Mint:  **Of course I'm gonna update again; I hate stories that just stop right in the middle and are ditched and I don't wanna be even more of a hypocrite than I already am ^^;;  Little brothers are stupid and, er, stupid…

**Radioactive Bubblegum:  **Why am I even replying to this?  I probably e-mailed you…  probably.  Oh yes, I did…  heh heh…

**Dragonmaster**** Kurai**:  To quote Crimson Dragoness, AHH!  I'VE BEEN POKED!  THE PAIN, THE HORROR, THE SUFFERING!  Well, the suffering is mine; Crimson isn't creative enough to think of a full sentence…  oh wait, I'm not creative enough to even think of my own thinger…  heh heh…

**slime-frog****:  **Because I only started writing this on the 29th?  *laughs*

**Chibi-Chiri****:  **WHOO!  GO JACK!  It won't be so hot for long, hee hee hee…  You'll find that out after this chapter, lol ^^

**Disclaimer:  **I do not own Foaly, Holly, Julius and the others…  I only own _Foaly's Carrot _and whatever else I decide to throw into this chapter…

**Dedication:  **TazMoon!  Cause she's the one who said 'yes' when I asked her if I should do a Foaly chapter ^^  So she's the person you can A) applaud to if you wanted this or B) kill cause you aint gonna find out what Holly's reaction is until the next chapter ^^  BWAHAHA!  Actually, that isn't TazMoon's fault…  That's mine.  I've been meaning to do this chapter since…  er, just after Holly's second entry…  so I had no idea how the last chap was gonna- *cuts self off*  I'm rambling.  The second reason this chapter is dedicated to her is because she Beta'd this chapter…  She offered to, lol…  She doesn't even know that I'm dedicating this to her ^^  tee hee hee ^^  I wanna be online when she reads this ^^  I'm rambling again…  On with the fic ^^

*~*~*~*~* Foaly: Entry Two (of sorts…) *~*~*~*~*

Taken from Foaly's journal ~ Encrypted

Translated – Gnommish to English

Haven City

Police Plaza

Ops Booth

            Frond!  Frond!  D'Arvitting Frond!  Julius and Holly are going to **_murder_ me!  I've completely lost contact with my ship!  My poor, poor baby!**

            I lost contact with her right after she took off.  I didn't notice because I was, er, _ignoring_ the elves.  I can't even figure out what direction they left in!  Frond!  I _knew _I should have put a tracking system on her.  Damn budget cuts.  I have no way to find my baby!  I'm going to have to upgrade all of my computers to match the l33tness of my baby!  (**A/N:  **_Can't you just see Foaly writing in l33t?  Or is it just me?_)  But I don't have the money.  And to get more money, I have to talk to the Council…

            …I'm dead.

            The Council isn't going to like this…

~

            Nope, the Council hates this very much…  They told me to 'use those brains of yours and find a loophole in your planning!'  Don't they realize that when you do anything technical, you find the loopholes and fix them _before you market it or anything?  There are no loopholes to my ship!  None at all.  And I'm the smartest Fairy under the world._

            Damn, it's Captain Ash Vein.  Jerk.  I can't figure out what Holly sees in him.  He's just a self-centred pretty boy.

            Vein:  Hey Foaly.  How's it hanging?

            Me:  You've been watching too many Mud Men movies shows.

            Vein:  Whatever man!

            Me:  Or listening to too much crap.

            Vein:  You look down, bro.  What's the matter?

            Me:  None of your business.

            Vein:  Oh come on!

            Me:  Do you really want to know?

            Vein:  Hell, why not?

            I really shouldn't tell him.  He'll tell Lili Frond then she'll tell everyone.  I really shouldn't tell him.  On the other hand, it's perfect revenge on those elves.  Lili will spread some rumour about them being together…  hee hee hee!

            Me:  Captain Holly Short and Commander Julius Root are currently stuck on a ship that they entitled _Foaly's Carrot somewhere._

            Vein:  Somewhere?

            Me:  I've lost contact with the ship.  I don't know anything about the ship, them, or their location.  Hopefully they'll come back.  But they are quite a few hours overdue…

            Vein:  Hey, isn't that Captain that chick who keeps following me around?

            Me: …

            Vein:  Hey, that is her!  I'm free at last!

            Me:  …

            Vein:  Yes!  Now me and Lili have the ladies room all to ourselves.

            Me:  …

            Oh Frond…  Poor Holly.

            Vein:  I've gotta go tell Lili the good news.

            Me:  You go do that.

            Poor Holly.  She already hates Lili so much.  This is going to kill her when she comes back.  Vein is such a jerk.

            Back to the problem at hand.  Finding my ship.

~ One Hour Later ~

            It's not working.  Nothing is working.  I think I'll go for a walk.

~ Two Minutes Later ~

            Oh my lord Frond.  I just walked past the ladies room.  I never needed to know that Lili's a screamer…  Isn't anyone gonna do anything?  Dump cold water on them?  Anything?

~ Half Hour Later ~

            Lili's still screaming.  Nobody is doing anything.  Is it left upon my shoulders again?

~ Five Minutes Later ~

            It appears so.  Chix Verbil came in and said that I 'volunteered' to break up Lili and Vein.  The screams are a distraction and nobody is getting any work done.  Hmmm…  What should I use to stop this?

~ Three Minutes Later ~

            I've got it!  Ice cold water; everyone knows how us fairies hate it!  Mwhahaha!  I need Chix.

            Me:  CHIX!

            Chix:  Yes?

            Me:  Get me some ice water.

            Chix:  Here?

            Me:  Obviously.  I don't care how you get it, just get it to me and soon.

            Chix:  Yes Foaly sir.

~ One Minute Later ~

            Chix:  Here you are.

            Me:  Thank you.  Now, to cover my eyes.

            Everyone is watching me…  Some one is thing the Darth Vader song.  How I can hear it, I don't know…  Time to water the plants!

            HA!  Lili screams even louder when a centaur dumps ice water on her.  Though Vein takes the cake.  He screams wonderfully, higher than Lili could even dream.  Apparently, he's one of the sorts who fear the cold.  He deserves it.

*~*~*~*~*

**A/N:  **I'm done now…

            _~ Mage Kitty =^.^=_


	7. Holly: Entry III

*~*~*~*~* Foaly's Carrot *~*~*~*~*

            _~ Mage Kitty_

**A/N:  ***yawn*  I'm tired...  I just watched X2 for the second time.  Without realising it.  I swear, I've never seen the movie, but I knew pretty much exactly what they were gonna say!  Or do...  Either I watched the movie a looooooooong time ago, or I had a really creepy dream.  Like the dream I had last night about failing my Bronze Cross class...  *shudders* The test is tomorrow.  Or today, depending on when I update this.  Damn.  I spend a page on review answers…

**Radioactive Bubblegum:  **I've probably already e-mailed you.  Why am I even doing this?

**Kelsey:  **You're little, er, problem with my chapter is that I did post it, but FF.Net screwed up and wouldn't show you the chapter.  In the URL code thing, try switching the current chapter number to the number you want it to be.  Works for me.  Sometimes.  I'm afraid reading my mind is _not_ going to help you with the updating. I don't know what's going to happen, and you'd have to slush through all my other stories, because, for some reason, this one is in the back of my mind.  Cause it's easy to write.  *laughs*  And hacking into my computer is going to do you _sooo much good.  I don't pre-write.  Everything is posted five minutes after I finish.  Unless I get someone to beta it…  *laughs*_

**alex:  **Er, I updated now…  Is that soon?

**EvilMint((#2)):  **Thank you…  updating soon, eh?  I can manage about once every eight days…?  *nervous grin*

**slime frog:  **Hee hee hee…  Bouncing shoes!  *laughs*  You wanna hear about Holly and Root, eh?  Er, just keep reading then ^^

**Spasmodic dust bunny:  **Glad you like it ^^

**Evil Mint:  **Wait a minute…  There are two of you!  Oh.  That's the purpose of the ((#2)) in the other one's name…  I see now!  *laughs* Yes, Ash's just a pretty boy.  But she gets contestant number two, Commander Julius Root!  *falls down laughing*  And, hey!  Everyone has a fic that's better than theirs!  I could name off a million Hermione/Severus fics that are better than this one…  But I won't.  I'll keep your mind semi-intact…

**Mz. Shanaynay:  **You're secret obsession isn't so secret, you know?  You just said it at least ten times…  Wow, I've got another best friend!  Tee hee hee!  *hugs*

**Phire Phoenix Chan:  **Or maybe not!  I didn't remember what I said Holly's reaction was gonna be (partially because I only had the vaguest idea), so I winged it!  Tee hee.

**Chibi-Chiri:  **Yup, that's Foaly for you!  And I have no idea what I'm gonna do to Lili…  hmm…  *evil grin*  heh heh heh…

**Disclaimer:  **I don't own Holly or Julius.

*~*~*~*~* Holly – Entry Three *~*~*~*~*

Taken from Capt. Holly Short's written journal

Bottom of Pacific Ocean

Inside _Foaly's Carrot_

Floor 

            Oh my dear fucking whatever higher power is in charge of my life.  I just had the most horrible nightmare.  I dreamed that Root and I were asleep.  Together.  He had his arms around me.  There's something on my waist.  AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!  I don't think that was a dream...

            Me:  *screams very loudly*

            Root:  What?  What's going on?

            Me:  What.  Are.  You.  DOING?

            Root:  What?

            That's it.  He's sooo dead!  I'm smacking that bitch one!

            Me:  *smacks Root*  What the hell do you think you're doing?

            Root:  What did I do?

            Me:  I just had an Out Of Body experience.  I do not like what I just saw.

            Root:  What did you see?  And why did you slap me?

            Me:  Why were you holding me?

            Root:  Uh, it's cold?

            Me:  What hell are you talking about man?  It's boiling!

            Root:  It was cold!

            Me:  And I'm going to believe that?

            Root:  Ho-

            Me:  Zip it.

            Root:  Holly, pl-

            Me:  Zip it.

            Root:  Capt-

            Me:  ZIP IT COMMANDER!

            Ooooo!  What gave him the right to do that?  He spent half of last day staring at me, I go to sleep to escape it, and I wake up to find him cuddling up to me!  This is... is...  ARRRGGHH!  No words in any language can describe this!  What did I do to deserve this?  Why is he doing this to me?  What can I do to escape?  Happy place, happy place...

            ...Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaasssssshhh...

            Yummy.

            Deep breaths, Holly, breathe deep.

            Wall ball...  Maybe I could 'accidentally' throw it at the Commander and knock him out.  No, wait...  The _last time I tried that, it didn't work.  His skull is waaaay to thick._

            Oh well.  Wall balls are still amusing.  Throw, bounce, bounce, catch...

~

            Hmmm...  What's this?  A peace offering?  Root's made breakfast.  Should I take it?

            I don't have much of a choice.  Can't waste any food.  I have no idea how long we'll be down here for.  Down here.  The bottom of the Pacific Ocean.  With Commander Julius Root acting odd.

            I'd rather be in the Ops Booth listening to Foaly rant about something....

            ...Then maybe Ash would walk in...

            Yummy.

            Ash, not the food.

            Actually, the food isn't that bad.  For a melted protein bar.  Bloody temperature shift is melting all the food.

            I think it's getting hotter.

            Damn jump-suit.  Aren't you supposed to keep me from getting hot?  Oh well, I'll deal with this the old fashioned way.  Unzipping the zipper a bit.

            Root's staring at me again.

            All I'm doing is unzipping my suit a bit.  It's not like I'm taking it off.  That's what Lili Frond is for.

            Besides, I've got a bra on.  I didn't unzip it that low, did I?

            He's making me nervous.

            Is he... Sweating?  More than what he should be for this heat?

            He is.

            Now he's licking his lips.

            Me:  Er, Commander?  Are you all right?

            Root:  Yes, yes.  I'm fine.

            Me:  Are you sure?

            Root:  *authoritative, 'I'm higher ranked than you' voice* I'm _fine_ Captain.

            I don't believe him.  The last thing I need is him to get a heart attack from this heat.  He's lasted this long, though.

            I need to make a paper fan.  Damn.  I ran out.  Unng.  Don't wanna move.  Must reach papers...  Damn table...  Too wide.

            Root:  *nervously, not meeting my eyes* Do you want this, Captain?

            Me:  It's Holly, and yes, I want those papers.  Well, one.

            Root:  *hands a few to me*

            Me:  Thanks.  *smile*

            Damnit.  Now he's back into his nervousness.  It's not like I'm going to kill him.  I think he got the picture that I want no more surprises when I wake up.

            I really can't stay mad at anyone long.  Except for that Mud-Boy.

            Who am I kidding?  I'm not really mad at him anymore...  I guess I miss him.  In an odd sort of sense.  Life's exciting when he's around.

            Actually, he doesn't have to be around for life to be exciting anymore.  Look at all of this!

            Hmm...  I've made my fan!  Mmmm...  Semi-cool air...

            I'm so glad I have short hair.  My head would be so hot if I did.  Ugg.  My hair's soaked in sweat.  Disgusting.  I'm so not running my hands through my hair again.

            He's looking at me again.  I would hide in the bathroom, but it's bad enough out here.  Damn claustrophobia.

            Still staring.

            Me:  Er, do you want one, Commander?

            Root:  Ju- er, sure.

            What was he going to say before he cut himself off?  I wonder...

            Me:  Okay.

~

            Now we both have fans.  It's too hot to do anything but sit here and fan ourselves.  It's like a bloody sauna in here.

            I wish there's a shower.

            Root:  I need a shower.

            Me:  *laughs* I was thinking the same thing.

            Root:  It's so evil.  There is all this water just right out there.  *gestures to the windows*  And we can't reach it.

            Me:  Not unless we want to drown.

            Root:  Stupid heater.  *kicks it*

            I think the heater just stopped running.

            We look at each other.  We look at the heater.  We look back at each other.

~

            Still looking at each other.

            It's getting colder.

            Isn't the heater going to cut in?

            Me:  Uh, Commander…  I think it's busted more…

            Root:  *sarcastically* Acute observation, Holly.

            Me:  Uh, thanks?

            Great.  Now it even worse in this hellhole…

*~*~*~*~*

**A/N:  **Well, me finished this.  For this week…  Sleep.  I need sleep.  Damn 8:45 AM…

            _~ Mage Kitty =^.^=_


	8. Julius: Entry III

*~*~*~*~* Foaly's Carrot *~*~*~*~*

            _~ Mage Kitty_

**A/N:  **Wow, this is a day after I wrote the last chapter!  Or two.  Well, a day after I posted the last chapter.  I'm really on the ball today.  Or maybe it's just because I have no homework and can't get on the upstairs computer.  Either way, I'm moving fast!  *Five days later*  Never mind…

**Radioactive Bubblegum:  **I'm doing stuff now…

**alex****:  Er, is this soon?  Probably not…  heh heh…**

**slime**** frog:  Yes, I'm very cruel.  I take extreme delight in torturing my characters.  Except they aren't me.  Er, I take extreme delight in torturing Eion Cofler's characters…  That's a bit better.  Can I have a cookie?  I like cookies…  And sugar.  Mmm…  sugar…**

**Evil Mint:  **It's both of you now?  AHHH!  Now I'm more confused!  Yum…  Whipped Cream…

**Kelsey:  **No pre-writing for me.  That would be too…  er, smart?  Lol…  Yes, my head would be kinda empty.  Webcomics, FanFics…  The necessities of life.

**Chibi-Chiri****:  Oooo!  Thank you!  I feel special!  Tee hee hee…  Yes, he does have a staring problem, doesn't he.**

**Spasmodic dust bunny:  ***laughs*

**Alex wearing Christmas hat:  **AHHH!  NOT THE SHREDDER!  Wait, I'm not scared of it.  My ladle will rule all!  This soon enough?

**Tonduil**** the Elf:  Fluff is gooood!**

**Phire**** Phoenix Chan:  Yes, isn't moderate temperature evil?  No changes in this chap, though…**

**punkpig****:  I will continue.  No worries there…**

**Disclaimer:  **I don't own Holly or Julius.

*~*~*~*~* Julius – Entry Three *~*~*~*~*

Taken from Cmdr. Julius Root's written journal

Bottom of Pacific Ocean

Inside _Foaly's Carrot_

Pilot's Seat 

            Hey!  I almost fit into this seat!  Who knew that in one day of exercise one could almost fit into this chair!

            Holly's currently using the machine.  It's the only way to stay warm in this bloody ship.  Unless you count body heat.  No way Holly would go with that.

            Damn, it was better when it was really hot.  Holly had her jumpsuit zipped down a bit.  No, don't think about that.  She's your officer.  Hmmm...  May as well play Solitaire.  Holly didn't teach me that game for nothing.

~

            Why can't I win?  Maybe if I move club on this spade here...

            Holly:  Cheater.

            Whoa!  Where did she come from?

            Me: ...

            Holly:  *reaches over my shoulder and moves a few cards around*  Here.  Have fun.

            Me:  *shiver*

            Frond, I just shivered.  I'm so pitiful...

            Oh, why do I even bother?  Holly would never like me like that anyway.  I'm just the fat, red-faced old Commander.  She'd be better off with Ash Vein.

            Oh, who am I kidding?  Ash's a jerk; Holly deserves better.  But I am not.  Trouble I guess.  No, wait.  Didn't they go out ages ago?  Yes, I remember Wing Commander Ivy Vinyáya telling me about that.  Back when they were in the Academy.  Chix Verbil?  Holly would kill him in less than a second.  Grub Kelp?  This list keeps getting worse and worse.  Nobody in the LEP is for Holly.  Besides, office relationships are not a good thing.  Hmmm...  That's a good thing to use so I hang onto my sanity.

            How am I going to spend however long in here with her always around?

            Wait, I didn't even like her before this.

            Or maybe I did and didn't realise it.

            Did I?

            I wonder.

~

            Actually, I think I might have.  I was a lot rougher on her than anyone else.  Not just because she's a girl.  What do those weird magazines that Foaly reads say?  Pushing her away.  Subliminally.  I really have to stop listening to that centaur when he starts reading those Mud Men magazines like 'Seventeen' and 'YM'.

            Wait a minute...  Aren't those teenaged Mud Girl magazines?

            HAHAHA!

            Holly:  What's so funny?

            Me:  Foaly reads teenaged Mud Girl magazines.

            Holly:  He gets them for presents from me.

            Me:  Why do you have them?

            Holly:  I have a reeeeeaally odd little cousin...  Hey...  How do you know about them?

            Me:  Foaly has an annoying habit of reading them out loud.

            Holly:  *laughs*

            Holly has a nice laugh.

            Holly:  You want any water?

            Me:  If it is hot water…

            Holly:  Sorry, all there is is ice cold, blah.

            Me:  I take it you've lost your urge to drink water.

            Holly:  Is Foaly gonna die?

            Me:  *laughs*  Very true.

            Holly:  I call sabotaging all of his carrots.

            Me:  I call getting out of here first.

            Holly:  That could help.  Frond damn centaur!

            Me:  You have no idea how many times I've cursed him.

            Holly:  He's gonna die.  I hope he knows it.

            Me:  Oh, he'd have to be stupider than Verbil _not to realize it…_

            Holly:  Sometimes I wonder…

            I would really like a mug of coffee now…

            Holly:  Coffee would be good…  Uh, why are you looking at me like that for?

            Me:  I was just thinking about coffee.

            Holly:  Er, creepy…

            Me:  That's one way of putting it.

            Holly:  *edges closer to me*  Cold…

            Me:  Speaks the woman who dove into the ocean to save her enemy's father.

            Holly:  What?  Art- Fowl's dad didn't do anything to us…

            Me:  Still, how are you cold now?

            Holly:  I was in the water for all of five seconds!

            Me:  All right, all right!  I'll shut up.

            Holly:  *shiver*  Good. *edges closer*

            Ahh!  What is she doing?  She's moving closer…  And closer…  Frond!  What am I supposed to do here?  She's touching me now…  Er, maybe she's just cold.  And hallucinating.  No, I don't think so.  What does she want?  Er maybe if I put my arm around her she'll stop confusing me.

            Nope.  Still confused.  But why is she snuggling up to me?

            The mysteries of life.

*~*~*~*~*

**A/N:  **Well, that was crap…  Er, TazMoon…  Where are you?  I need you to beta this…  Taz?

            _~ Mage Kitty =^.^=_


	9. Holly: Entry IV

*~*~*~*~* Foaly's Carrot *~*~*~*~*

            _~ Mage Kitty_

**A/N:  **Nung…  Tired…  Whoa, wait…  'nung' is a word??  Never mind…  The spellchecker was just a little slow one the uptake…

**Radioactive Bubblegum:  **Come on, you already know I'm not afraid of a little shredder thing…  lol…

**Laughing Dragoness:  **Midterms and test in general suck much…  evil, evil.  MUST DIE!

**Alex:  **Obviously, I can just leave you there.  I just did, bwhahah!

**Spasmodic dust bunny:  **What?  Holly really did get them from her little cousin, I swear!  *shifty eyes*

**Tonduil**** the Elf:  I wonder if there is a FF author alive that doesn't have problems with updating.  Not counting updated every few seconds with chapters less than a page long.  That's just creepy…  Though this is the third fic I've written today…  I'm going to overload on writing soon…**

**Phire**** Phoenix Chan:  Thank you ^^**

**slime**** frog:  Gasp, -2?  Only minus two??  Er, you _are using Celsius, right?  If you are, ONLY MINUS TWO?  FROND, IT'S *runs over to thermometer thinger on outside wall.  Stops.  Turns back to computer.  Goes to a weather website* -12.4 DEGREES CELSIUS OUT!  And that isn't even cold…  Hell, a few days ago it was plus 1…  Cookie now?_**

**Alex:  **Wait a minute…  Didn't you already review??  Okay, me confused!  Again.  I wanna write lots, but read the end A/N of the last chapter of ADATFR I posted…  Too lazy to say it all again…

**Kelsey:  **I know Julius is too old for Holly.  *grins*  That's why I wrote this ^^  I like weird ships, obviously proven by my obsession with Hermione/Severus and Holly/Root.  Of course they will have the same feelings for each other eventually.  Otherwise it would be an angst fic.  And I don't like angst.  *twitches*  Yes, I know I wrote one, but still…  I don't like angst fics…  Will Foaly find out?  Well, I dunno…  In, er, two? Chapters you will know.  Not exactly, though…  It'll just be another Foaly chapter.  Let's see, this is a Holly one, the next is Julius, so that means the one after that is Foaly!  And I have the next two chapters (Holly and Julius) half written in my mind.  Well, the beginning and the end.  Wow.  So useful…  Whoa, I've written a lot about nothing, so I'll shut up now…

**Evil Mint:  **Nuuuuuuurg…  Tired…  Writer's Blocks are evil…  They must die.  Die.  DIE!  BWHAHAHAHA!  Same with Artist's Block.  Evil things.  *looks pissed*

**Alex:  **Okay, now I think that you and the other two before you are one in the same.  *twitches*  Come on, it only took me eight or so days to update!

**Fine, I'll keep the same name:  Er, never mind…  You changed it…  Alex472:  **You have no life girl…  I do believe that you reviewed this fic 6 times in the last 9 days…

**Alex472:  **Why didn't I put this in with the last one?  Oh well…  BWHA!  I already told you this, I think, but I DREW HOLLY!  BWHAHAHA!  Now I just have to use Krymsan for her scanner, again…

**Alex472, again:  **CARROTS ^^  #

Well, I'm done now.  With Alex's six reviews, it can take awhile ^^;;;

**Disclaimer:  **I don't own Holly and Julius.

*~*~*~*~* Holly – Entry Four *~*~*~*~*

Taken from Capt. Holly Short's written journal

Bottom of Pacific Ocean

Inside _Foaly's Carrot_

Ju – Root's arms 

            Mmmm…  Warm…  Finally warm in this hell hole…  Ju – Root's holding me.   Why am I letting him?  Oh yes…  Cold…  Good enough reason…  Tired…  I'm going to sleep now…

~

            What?  Where am I?  Someone's arms are around me.  Jul – Root, obviously.  Who else could it be?  I think the heater's working again…  Still tired.  Snuggle closer.  Sleeeeep…

~

            What?  I swear Juli – Root was sleeping next to me a few minutes ago…  Where is he?  Colder now, but it's still warmish.

            Julius:  You up?

            Wait a minute…  I just wrote 'Julius' instead of 'Root'!  Er what does that mean?  Oh lovely magazines I gave to Foaly, what does it say about that?  Wait, no, can't think about that now.  Julius, what?  Why did I write that?  Is watching me.  Ugg.  I look stupid.  Er…

            Me:  Uh, yes…

            Julius (GAH!):  Here, I've made some food.  Well, as much as you can make food around here.

            Me:  Yeah, bloody Foaly.

            Julius (I give up…):  We're always cursing Foaly.

            Me:  Yes, we must think of a new topic, Julius.

            OH MY LORD FROND!  I JUST CALLED HIM JULIUS!  I'M DEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAD!!!

            Julius:  We really should.

            He didn't say anything about the 'Julius' comment?  Has the world gone mad?

            Me:  Er, yes…

            Julius:  Why are you blushing?

            Frond!

            Me:  Uh…  I don't know…

            Julius:  Nice answer, Holly.

            Frond, Frond, Frond, Frond, Frond!

            Me:  No reason.

            Julius:  *sceptically*  Riiiiight…

            Well, maybe he'll leave me alone now…

            Me:  How about we play a game of cards, Julius.

            DO'H!  AGAIN I SAID THAT WORD!  _Now _I'm doomed…

            Julius:  Sounds fine with me.  What do you want to play?

            What?  I'm not dead?

            Me:  Uh, how about 31?  It's similar to 21 Blackjack…

            Now it's time to whip Julius' ass at another card game!  BWHAHAHA!

            Why do I keep calling him Julius?

*~*~*~*~*

**A/N:  **Evilly short, I know…  But I have stuff planned for the next chapter, oh yes I do ^^  BWHAHAHA!  TazMoon doesn't even know and she's currently asking me  (over and over again) if I'm done typing this ^^  Oh, but she wants to know, yes she does ^^  BWAHHAHAHA!  The secret is between me and Krymsan!  And possibly Pyro too.  I might have told her, but I don't think so…  Heh heh heh…  Next week, I'll do the next evil cliffie of DOOM!  BWHAHAHAHAHA!!!!  Hyper!

            _~ Mage Kitty =^.^=_


	10. Julius: Entry IV

*~*~*~*~* Foaly's Carrot *~*~*~*~*

            _~ Mage Kitty_

**A/N:  **And I finally update, whoo!  Nothing else to say…

**Alex472:  **Must I be threatened, somewhat, every chapter?  *whimpers*  It ain't my fault I'm terrible at updating, don't write enough, leave evil cliffies and don't make sense…  Wait, that is…

**Alex472:  **It's currently -45 Degrees Celsius today.  NO SCHOOL!  WHOO!

**bluecocoagir****:  Yes, he is a little ass, isn't he.  Literally, that is.**

**Laughing Dragoness:  **This soon enough?

**sam****:  Pencil sharpeners.  Ugh.  I hate them.  So I use mechanical pencils, lol ^^**

**towlieman****:  I writing!  Writing!**

**Kelsey:  **Ohhh, I meant that I wouldn't be updating much, lol…  much.  Oh yes, I'm a procrastinator ^^  What will happen between Julius and Holly?  Read on!

**Phire**** Phoenix Chan:  **Er, it's longer.  Heh heh…

**Chibi-Chiri****:  **Julius will never win, never!  Wait.  I've got an idea.  *snickers evilly*

**TazMoon****:  **Come on Taz!  You know that I _never update soon!_

**CaptainRoseShort****:  Hmmm…  why is your name so familiar…  Oh yes, that's because I made Holly's middle name 'Rose' in ADTATFR…  lol.  I laugh.  Much.  Oh.  That means that I can't swear, be stupid, sound like a stalker, sound like a madwoman, etc?  Your e-mail is monitored because you're 14?  I was 11 and I had an unmonitored e-mail.  It was also my first one.  Yes, add me!  ADD ME!**

**Evil Mint:  **Evil Cliffies of Doom are soooo much fun ^^  You know, your excuse happens to me all the time.  You're not alone.  Pretty much all of us suffer from that ^^

**The OddBird:  **Nope, you never ^^  Yes, Root is OOC.  I know that.  But that's because he's lovesick/an insane stalker.  Lol.  Glad to hear that I can make you laugh with my lame joke type things ^^  Chickens are creepy.  *edges away from a rabid chicken*

**Disclaimer:  **I don't own Holly or Julius…

*~*~*~*~* Julius – Entry Four *~*~*~*~*

Taken from Cmdr. Julius Root's written journal

Bottom of Pacific Ocean

Inside _Foaly's Carrot_

In front of table 

            Holly is _murdering_ me.  I can't win.  How is she so damn good at cards?

            Holly:  I'm getting something to drink.  You want any?

            Me:  Sure.

            Uh, why is there a red spot on her ass.  No, I was **_not_** looking at her ass.  The spot just caught my attention.  Maybe it's from the chair…

            Yeah, there's a spot there…  I wonder what it is?  _(Oh, I **wonder**…  *rolls eyes*)_

            Me:  Uh, Holly.  Do you realize that there's a red spot on your chair?  It looks almost like blood…

            Holly:  Oh crap.  *runs over and looks at chair*  Ohhhh crap.  Is there a red spot on my ass?  *Turns around*

            Me:  Uh yeah…  Why?

            Holly:  *ignoring me*  Foaly better have put pads or something in this thing!  *runs to bathroom and attempts to close door.  The door bounces back open*  DAMNIT!  *shuts door*  GAH!  THE CENTAUR IS GOING TO DIE!  DIE!  DIEEEEEEE!

            Me:  Uh, Holly…  What's wrong?

            Holly:  You're a guy.  You don't wanna know.

            Me:  Of course I'm a guy.  Why wouldn't I want to know?

            Holly:  *sighs*  If you insist.  Well, about once every month, women are plagued by a particular evil called…

            Me:  I DON'T WANT TO KNOW!

            Holly:  Told ya…  If we run out of toilet paper, it isn't my fault!

            Oh Frond.  I shouldn't have asked…

            Holly:  Bloody PMS, bloody centaur, bloody everything.

            Me:  You alright?

            Holly:  Oh, I'm just peachy.  Juuuust peachy.  Bloody blood stains…  *water starts to run*

            Me:  What are you doing?

            Holly:  Curious, ain't ya?  Attempting to clean my uniform.

            Me:  What?

            I'm going to check on Holly.  She isn't making much sense.  Open door.

            Holly:  WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING, JULIUS?!?

            Oops.  She _was_ washing her uniform.  With water.  With it off her body.  Frond she's hott.  Very, very hott.  She has such a perfect body, perfect eyes, perfect lips, perfect everything.  I could watch her for _hours._

            Holly:  *softly*  Why are you still staring at me?

            Me:  Uh…  Um…  Er…

            Excuse, I need an excuse.  Must think of an excuse.  Ughhh…

            Holly:  Well?

            Me:  Erm…

            I need an excuse.  Maybe staring at Holly more will help me think of one.

            Holly:  Okay, how about you just back out of the room, close the door and forget that this has ever happened.

            Me:  Unnnnnnnnnnnghh…

            GAH!  So articulate!

            Holly:  Okay, how about I just push you out of the door.

            Me:  Unnngghhh…  I'm leaving…

            I sound so stupid and brain dead.  Wait…  I _am brain dead…  Uh…  I think I'll look out the window.  Yes, the window…  There are fish.  Lots of them.  They are all white.  Some have glowy things dangling from their mouths.  Pretty._

            WHOA!  Those things with glowy things got big, sharp teeth.  Look out little fishy.  Oops, never mind.  You're eaten.  Violent little buggers, ain't they?

            Holly:  ARRRGGGHHH!!!  WHEN WILL THIS DAY END?!?

            Me:  Now what…  *quieter*  Though I'm not sure that I want to know.

            Holly:  Uniform is too wet to wear  *throws uniform out of door*

            Okay, it is completely drenched…  Wait.  If she can't wear the uniform…

            Me:  How did you manage to do that?

            Holly:  Oh, I dropped it a few times.

            Me:  Well, it is ridiculously hot in here.  Put in on the heater.

            Holly:  And what I am I going to wear?  Why should the heater be dressed but not me?

            Me:  Uh…  You could wear the uniform then…

            Holly:  I'll go with the heater idea and hide in the bathroom

            I wonder how long that idea will last for.  She is claustrophobic _(No, I did not forget about that… never had anywhere to put that in, okay?)_

            Holly:  *door opens*  Damn that Mud Boy.  And you *points finger at me* you will suffer greatly if I catch you staring at me, got it?

            Me:  Uh huh.

            Her back will turn, her back will turn!  AND I SHALL STARE AS MUCH AS I LIKE!

            Where did that come from?

            Holly:  Wanna play 31 again.

            Me:  I'll lose, but whatever.

            Holly:  Better than standing here watching fish get eaten.

            Me:  The things with glow things are evil.

            Holly:  They are lures.  And they use the lures to eat fish.  Normally it's too dark down here to see anything, so I suppose our light is messing up their eco-system.

            Me:  *blinks*

            Holly:  *sighs*  Never mind…  Just deal.

~

            Well, I got murdered.  Again.  I don't think I'm getting better…  Holly's uniform is still wet, I can tell by the cursing.  Doesn't matter to me much…  Though I think that lure fish thing is staring at Holly.  DIE FISH DIE!  Holly is mine, all mine…  Mine…

            Whoa.  Where did _that_ come from…?

            She _is_ my officer and all, but I still don't own her…

            I've got to do something about this, this, this… obsession.

            I know.  I'll kiss her.  Then when she slaps me, I might get unobsessed.

            Yeah right.

            Worth a shot.

            Me:  Holly?

            Holly:  Yeah.

            Here goes nothing…

            Me:  *walks over to Holly, wraps arms around her and kisses her*

            …

*~*~*~*~*

**A/N:  **And next chapter is a FOALY ONE!  Aren't you all sooo happy?

Heh heh heh…

I'm evil.  And have a snowday for the first time in my life.  So it's a cold day and the buses don't run.  Whatever, I take a bus so I don't have to go to school, whoo!  YEAH -45 DEGREES CELSIUS!

            _~ Mage Kitty =^.^=_


	11. Foaly: Entry III

*~*~*~*~* Foaly's Carrot *~*~*~*~*

            _~ Mage Kitty_

**A/N:  **Look how long it took me to update!  Whee!  Don't you just love me?  Holy shit…  I have a lot of review answers things to do…

**Radioactive Bubblegum:  **What's Holly going to do?  Tune in next chapter!

**Phire**** Phoenix Chan:  **Of course.  What else would I do?

**Slime Frog:  ***laughs*  I'm immune to the cold…  How could Holly slap him?  This is a romance fic with five chapters left!

**Alex:  **Yup, that's why I put it in!

**The Oddbird:  **Oh, Holly's got a bra and underwear on.  She doesn't go commando under her suit, O.o  Trust me, I'm not THAT insane…

**Leah:  **Yah right.  Cliffies are the bestest things ever.

**HyperCaz****:  **Of course it's better than Holly/Artemis.  Pretty much every ship is.  I do not really like Holly/Artemis…

**Incensio**** Lady:  **Of course it's insane…  Of course there is cliffy.  Mage like cliffies.

**Spasmodic Dust Bunny:  **Thank you.  I feel so special!  Creating the worst cliffy ever!

**Towlieman****:  **Thank you, thank you.  I try!

**Midnight**** Moonbeam:  **Thanks!

**Tonduil****:  **I hate romance that within 2 chapters the characters are having sex or whatever.  So very lame.  Actually, I once read a fic where the first chapter Snape and an OC were having sex.  e.e  Pitiful.

**The evil but niceish one:  …**I update now?

**Evenwolf****:  **Insane and good have the same meaning.

**Dark-Elven-Mage-of-Nuitari:  **Of course it's evil.  If it wasn't evil would I do it?

**Artemis fowl fan:  **Thanks

**Kelsey:  **Think.  There are five chapters left (after this one).  Will Holly kill Root?  Most likely not.  And I have no idea about the Celsius thing.

**Laughing Dragoness:  **We never have them either…  But we did!

**leah****:  **Sorry, nope.

**Alex:  **Nope, amazingly I don't have a Writer's Block.  I'm just lazy and don't have time.

**LEPrecon**** captain:  **No.  NEVER!  Heeey…  I'm talking to you on MSN!

**Evil Mint (the niceish one):  **Sorry, never updated fast!

**Evil Mint:  **Cliffies are good.

**Alex:  **You drew Holly?  Damn you.

**Skanky****: ** O.o

**CaptainRoseShort****:  **Okay!

**Alex:  **Do I mean what?  Confuzed.  Oh…  That…  I think the HTML code…  FF.Net striped it from my review ^^;

**Captain Amy:**  It died.

**Alex who is disguised as Rad:  **O.o  You do that….

**Happynutcase*****numba1:  **If you use MS Word, use normal formatting then save as a web page…

**Happynutcase*****numba1:  **Mage isn't afraid of sledgehammers.  *pulls out battle axe*

**Captin**** Amy:   **Too lazy

**Alex (the Toaster):  **Whatever man.  I've got a freaking Battle Axe as well.  NOTHING CAN STAND TO ITS MIGHT!!!

**Ariel:  **Too late, I did.

**Captain Amy:  **Nope, not doing that…  Good idea though…

**CaptainRoseShort****:  **No, I ran out of time and effort.  I've got ideas, no worries.

**A/N:  **DAMN!  Two pages of SHORT review answers…

**Disclaimer:  **Strangely enough, I do not own Foaly, Holly, Julius and other related media.  Yes, I do realize that this came as a huge surprise for all you.

*~*~*~*~* Foaly – Entry Three *~*~*~*~*

Taken from Foaly's journal ~ Encrypted

Translated – Gnommish to English

Haven City

Police Plaza

Ops Booth

            The Council knows.  Fun.  Wing Commander Ivy Vinyáya is probably the maddest.  Her old friend and her goddaughter are trapped in my 'faulty' ship somewhere.  I've locked the doors and blacked out the windows.  She can't see me, I can't see her.  She's out there, though.  I know it.  I can feel it in my hooves.  And a centaur's hooves never lie.  She's out there.  There's no doubt about it.

            It's also on the security cameras.

            So I'm stuck here.  May as well attempt to figure out how to fix my ship.  In other words, I have to figure out how to fix the impossible.

*ten minutes later*

            I give up.

            *chew*  Well, this is fun.  *gulp*  I'm stuck in the Ops Booth with very little food.  *chew*  Only this carrot.  *swallow*  This lovely, small orange carrot.  It looks so gooood.

            No.  Must resist the temptation.  Will not eat the carrot.  It's my only food item.

            It looks sooo good.

            I want it.

            No, wait…  That doesn't make sense.  I already own the carrot.

            I want to eat it.

            Sooo good.

            D'Arvit, my self control is soo good.

~

            I swear, it's saying "Resistance is futile.  Join the Dark Side."

            No, wait.  That's the TV.

            Never mind then.

~

            Yes, I'm still in here.  Sue me.  No, wait.  Don't.  I think Vinyáya, Julius and Holly will sue me for trauma.  At least, that's what I'd do.

            I think I'll just flip to the security camera for Lili's office.  Why did she of all people get an office?  Oh yes, Acting Commander Trouble Kelp said so.  *rolls eyes*  It's a regular Soap Opera in that room.

~

            Ugh.  Never mind.  Bloody nympho.

            Alright, that _was_ uncalled for.  She wasn't, er…  you know…  This time.  Just making out with the Acting Commander.

            Trouble's really slack.  So is the entire LEP.  Except for me.  I swear, everyone's happy that Julius is gone.

            …The3n again, who'd want an angry, old, strict beetroot over a relaxed you, casual elf?

            …Me.

            I admit it.  I miss both of them.  Trouble's too young to make a good Commander.  He hasn't been scarred enough yet.  Sheesh, he's only a few decades older than Holly.

            Holly.  Nobody really misses her either.  I guess it's because they can make all the rude comments about women they want and nobody will lift a finger against them.  And they can do extra-curricular activities taught by Lili Frond in the lady's room.  Pitiful.

            So I'm about the only one who wants them back.  Figures.  Well, me and Vinyáya…

            I should probably go back to trying to locate and/or fix my ship.

            Yah, right.  Like _that's _ever going to happen.  The only way to locate it is from the inside.  Because you know exactly where it is.  The only way to start it or _anything_ is from the inside.  Hell, there's even an emergency start up-

            THAT'S IT!  The emergency start up thinger!

            Damn.  I never told them about it.  Holly might know, though.  I've only been talking about my ship for how long?

            So that's our only hope.  That Holly can figure out how to start the ship.

            If she's even alive.

*~*~*~*~*

**A/N:  **Crap chap, I know.  Just be glad I updated…

            _~ Mage Kitty =^.^=_


	12. Holly: Entry V

*~*~*~*~* Foaly's Carrot *~*~*~*~*

            _~ Mage Kitty_

**A/N:  **I update.  Be amazed…

**The Toaster:  **I'm slow.  Learn that.

**HyperCaz****:  **Why?  I like putting myself down…  O.o  Calm down, okayz?

**Towlieman****:  **Oye!  Romance.  Happy?

**Mad Sam:  **How do you know there wasn't?

**slime**** frog:  **AHAHA!  Don't you just LUUUUUURVE me?

**Ariel:  **Yah think?

**Laughing Dragoness:  **Why thank you ^^  *laughs*

**The OddBird:  **Ahaha.  Yesh.  The plot's advancing.  It kinda has to, considering that I have only four more chapters left…

**guardian**** of da indigo key:  **Why thank you.

**Rad**** Bubblegum:  **Of course Holly'll find it.  Do you really think that Julius would?  *laughs*  Yah, riiiiiiiight.  Ha ha…  My snowboarding season ended only a few weeks ago, xD

**a**** reviewer person:  **Creative name…  Yesh, I know that Root's fat.  That's what I was saying.  Read the entire thing properly and you'll realize that I was dissing people for making him like that -_-

**most**** SOUR lemon alive:  **Thank you.

**Captin**** Amy:  **Right away…  Sure.  Never gunna happen…

**Hex21:  **Update soon?  You should realize that I _never_ do that…

**Aly****:  **Okay then…

**Angel of Spring Rain:  **Yesh, I killed your name.  I'm too lazy to spell the other word…  I e-mailed you…

**Meade:  **How could I leave such an evil cliffy?  Well, that's my only skill…

**DragonRose13:  **You're reading a Holly/Julius fic and you're freaked out by the pairing -_-  Insane…  Anyways, thanks for the bagillion reviews ^^

**Grub Kelp:  **Mage Kitty, not odd?  Neva gunna happen…

**bozza****:  **You spelt write wrong…

**Phire**** Phoenix:  ***watches eyes sparkle for several chapters*

**Kat097:  **I must disagree.  Among my AF fics, I find Idiot Savant better…  A entirely different thing from this, but still much, much better written, grammatically and plot wise.  I never accept compliments for this fic…  Well, usually not ^^;

**Kaura**** Ivvy Nightsword:  **Love your name ^^  Thank you.  At the very least, if you wrote a fic, I do believe that your grammar and spelling would be amazing.  Congrats on being one of my few reviewers who can spell…

**SilberEngel****:  **Ha ha…  I'm not a Holly/Artemis person…  Glad you like it, though ^^

**me****:  ***raises eyebrows*  Just try it.  I'm a furry…  *snarls and swishes tail*

**albinoblacksheep007:  **Saskatchewan.  Sask-At-Chew-an.  You get it?  But it's all good.  CAUSE YOU AGREE WITH ME THAT TSDADAP IS BETTER!  *hugs*  Thank you!

**VampyGenieWitch****, or should I say VampyGenieBitch?:  **Glad you like it.  Somewhat.  How do people like this thing?  *rolls eyes*  It SUCKS!  I have chocolate, but no real BattleAxe…  *sighs*

**Disclaimer:  **Don't own anything owned by Eoin Colfer.  Rest is mine.

*~*~*~*~* Holly – Entry Five *~*~*~*~*

Taken from Capt. Holly Short's written journal

Bottom of Pacific Ocean

Inside _Foaly's Carrot_

Staring vaguely off into space__

            Oh.  My.  Lord.  Frond.

~

            Oh.  My.  Lord.  Frond.

~

            Oh.  My.  I'm sure you get the point now.

~

            Can I write coherent sentences yet?

            It appears so.

            I think I've died.  Or am sleeping.  Or am stoned.

            Lord Frond, how often does your Commander kiss you?

            None, right?  Yet mine just kissed me.

            Yes, Commander Julius Root kissed me, Captain Holly Rose Short.

            Gasp.  Shock.  Horror.  Amazement.

            Please excuse me while I faint.

~

            Damnit.  Apparently you can't make yourself faint.

            Alright, what I was fainting over…

            Will I ever write paragraphs longer than one line?

            Er, that wasn't what I was fainting over…  heh heh…

            Anyways, what I was fainting over.  Not only did Commander Julius Root kiss me, Captain Holly Rose Short…  Wait.  Does Julius have a middle name?  If so, what is it?

            I'm doing it again.  Stalling to a piece of paper.  How sad is that?

            Don't answer that.

            No.  Wait.  You can't.  You're a piece of paper.

            Oh Frond.  Now you're personified?

            Save me.

~

            Oh yes, I was talking about Commander Julius Ro- I'm sure you get the point…  Kissing me.  Must I make that clear?  **_KISSING ME!_**  I hope you get that now…  But that's not the point.  The point is…

            I kissed him back.

            There, I said it.  It wasn't that hard.

            Okay, it took me five minutes to write the letter I.

            I'm sooooo sad…

            And insane.

            I need help.  Bad.

~

            Damnit, why do I want to kiss him again.  He's my Commander.  Think that, Holly, think that.

            Isn't working…  Fine, he isn't hott.  Why did I say that word?  *shifty eyes*  Heh heh…  He's waaaaaaay older than me.  Nope, that doesn't work…  He's fat.  Not really…  Well, he isn't like Ash or Trouble, but he's getting there.  Slowly.  Fungus cigars.  Oh damnit, I really don't care about them.

            You know, they say that when you love someone, their faults don't bother you.

            Who said that?  Where did I get that from?

            Oh.  That must mean that I never _did_ love Ash.

            Oh.  Wait.

            No.  I don't.

            I can't.

            It's just too scary.

            *shudder*

~

            I kissed him.  Heh heh.  He was surprised.  Should I describe it?

            Yes, let's reveal just how bad of a romance writer Captain Holly Rose Short is.

            Or a bad writer in general…

            _I walked up to Julius, standing somewhat nervous behind him.  He must have heard my come over, for he turned around and looked at me.  Silently, I stepped closer to him and looked up into his surprised eyes.  Slowly, I let my lips brush his.  Losing my nerve, I started to pull back, but Julius' arms slide around my waist and held me closer to him.  He deepened the kiss while I twined my arms around his neck._

Good Frond, I suck…  Ah well, it's all good…

~

            You know what?  I wonder what the date is.  Down here, you can't tell what the date is because of the lack of sun, fake or real.  Plus the computers are down so we can't check there.  Damn the current fashion.  Okay, it's been a fashion since forever.  Oh yes, the fashion is _not_ to wear watches.  If you do, you're shunned.  Seriously.  I knew this guy who moved here from Atlantis back when I was in school.  He was showing off his watch, and then everyone just pretended he didn't exist.  It was amazing.  I think the poor gnome faded away, because nobody believed that he existed.  Including himself.

            Poor sucker.

            Ah, yes…  I think it's been several days since my last entry.

            Summary of the past days:  Eat, sleep, drink, kiss Julius.

            Sound good?

            Yup, me and Julius are a couple, I guess.  Not that the LEP's going to know.  We've already agreed on that.  The press would die of happiness…

            Yup.  Not much to say…

*~*~*~*~*

**A/N:  **Yup.  Short.  Be glad it exists.  Four more chapters left to go…

            _~ Mage Kitty =^.^=_


	13. Julius: Entry V

**Foaly's Carrot**

_Mage Kitty_

**A/N: **Hello and welcome to Foaly's Carrot, the fic that never updates... I'm writing this at the cottage on the ooooold computer. Heh. It's only use is for drawing in MSPaint and typing/writing. And I'm forced to stay here for three weeks. And the clicky buttons on the mouse are busted. So I'll be doing a lot of writing. Aren't you happy?

**Rad**** Bubblegum: **Yup, I've updated. Strange to think that the last time I did, we were talking about winter sports, eh? No place to hike in Saskatchewan. And I have nothing to do now ;;

**The OddBird: **Oh, come on… Admit it. You find this at least vaguely amusing. And the H/R ship in general innocent smile

**VampyGenieWitch****: **Eh heh heh… I remember the Bitch thing, xD It's amazing what I remember and don't -.- I'm afraid you had to wait a few months to get more, eh?

**Holly Rox:** Did I or did I not e-mail you telling you how to do italics and stuff? I usually do, but my memory's fuzzy. Tell me in your review, okay? And it'll actually be soon for once

**Cookie monster: **I'm afraid I've long been afflicted by that disease. There's not cure.

**Maiden Genisis: **Really? Hmmm… I dunno. Maybe they are one in the same…

**RaptorK****: **If you're using MSWord, save as a webpage. Use normal formatting. It isn't that hard, it just took me a few hours of screwing around to get it

**WriterKat322: **Sorry, too lazy to do all the capital things… Mage like self-absorbed pretty boys. They're funny. They're even better when they're evil, xD I'm weird, yesh yesh

**The Toaster: **laughs I updated. Amazement, eh? Four more chapters… Er, you're going to hate me… Thanks

**slime frog: **laughs And now I update after all the second semester finals have been written, xD At least, for me… shrugs I dunno how it is in England ; And I'll never have to write a GCSE! Unless I move to England… Woah, that would be cooool!

**Dark-Elven-Mage-of-Nuitari: **Nope, Foaly doesn't get a girlfriend in this fic. And you're really going to hate me soon…

**Lady Lemmy: **O.o This is your sole reason for living? Well, it's very inconstant (and going to end soon), so I think you should get a new reason ;

**BeatlesLover****: **No, I did not have a hard time writing. Actually, I lie. I did. Because it's hard to do in diary format and first person. I'm such a moron -.-;; There are sooo many logic problems in this fic it isn't even funny…

**Phire**** Phoenix: **Trust me, I can't end anything without getting them two in a mess… Just you wait, xD

**Random and Insane Person**: Why thank you. And I'm a sixteen year old female, btw. And I'm not gay, xD

**The Toaster: **You reviewed on my birthday. You scare me muchly…

**The most SOUR lemon alive, HyperCaz, Ally, Laughing Dragoness, Sweetdeath04 and Thorney, Angel of Harusame, Wulfie, SilberEngel, Sora 360, D'Arvit, mad sam, Angle of the Elements: **I'm sorry for not replying to each of you individually, but I've got a time issue here… When it takes me an hour to reply to reviews, you know that something isn't right ; I'd just like to say thank you for reading _Foaly's Carrot _and for your support. Some of you I have known for a long time, which makes me sad to do this ; Very, very sorry ;

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Holly, Foaly or Julius. No shit.

Julius – Entry Five

Taken from Cmdr. Julius Root's written journal

Bottom of Pacific Ocean

Inside _Foaly's Carrot_

Staring vaguely off into space__

Wow.

Just. Wow.

I am amazed. Really amazed. Who would have known that Holly would have fallen for me. And this is Holly we're talking about. A little while ago, she was obsessing over Ash Vein.

I just realised that I won over Ash Vein. Crazy. Very crazy.

I think I'll rub it into his face. Well, I would if it wasn't for the fact that Holly and I agreed not to inform anyone about our relationship. It would create too many problems.

Of course, we have to get out of this bloody ocean before we even have a chance to talk to anyone else. Ugh. Where is Foaly? Shouldn't he be able to track this ship.

Holly: Nope. He made this stupid thing untrackable. And, for security reasons, he made it that his own computers couldn't track us.

Hmmm... I guess I must have said that out loud.

Me: Bloody centaur. Remind me to yell at him when we get back.

Heh. Holly has a devious smirk at the moment.

Holly: Don't worry, I won't forget.

Me: I'll let you play with him afterwards.

Holly sits on my lap and curls up.

Holly: purrs You're too kind.

Me: Of course.

I brush my lips against hers and she wraps her arms around my neck and pulls me closer to deepen the kiss. Don't feel like writing more at the moment. What? I'm writing without looking at the paper...

Holly's fiddling with the hand pad, again. I don't know why she bothers. This ship is dead. Dead.

Holly: Julius, do you have a knife?

Me: Sure.

I give her the knife. I wonder why she wa-

Me: WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

Holly: Cutting my finger, what does it look like?

Me: WHY ARE YOU DOING THAT?

Holly: I remembered something that Foaly said...

She holds her bleeding finger over the hand pad and the hand pad absorbs the blood. I think I'll walk over to her.

Me: What the...?

Holly: I have no idea.

Woah. The lights on the console all turned on. The engine is starting.

Me: I think you fixed it...

Holly: Woah.

Me: Can I have my knife back?

Holly: Sure

She hands me my knife.

Me: Thanks. Now, can you fly this thing back home?

Holly: No problem... I'm going to try and open a link to the Ops Booth.

Foaly: No need, Holly.

Foaly's face is on one of the monitors. Must resist urge to kill.

Holly: Foaly, how nice to see you.

Heh heh... Foaly's going to die. Oops, Foaly realises it as well.

Foaly: Well, I won't keep you two. Just fly back to Haven, okay?

He's gone.

Holly: What do you say to going home?

Me: Brilliant.

Holly: Right then. No civilians past the yellow line.

Me: Holly, there are no civilians, nor is there a yellow line.

Holly: Ruin my fun.

Me: Now let's take this baby home.

**A/N: **One chapter left. What? Are you confused now? Are you thinking that Mage had previously said that there were four chapters left (meaning that now there would be three). Well, you're right. I did say that. But I said that to keep with the pattern of Foaly, Holly, Julius, Holly, Julius. But now I really don't care and I don't really have much else to say, so the only thing left is the epilogue. And, trust me. I've got good ideas for that. So, one chapter left. I'll post it in five days or whenever I get home again.

_Mage Kitty =.=_

PS: NEARLY 200 REVIEWS! W00T TO THE NATION!


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